New tune!

I'm really digging this song right now for both the figurative and literal interpretation. Enjoy and let me know what you think!

Stuff me with hay...

And call me the Scarecrow... because dang if I feel like I should be dancing along the yellow brick road lamenting on how much better life would be if I only had a brain.

Ran a call last night of the variety of what the heck else can we do... nothing. I hate calls like that. I'm all for hand holding and comfort (which I did of course) but I just didn't feel like I did anything of importance medically. I really don't want to get back into the rut of feeling like nothing I do makes any difference. It was hard enough to get out of the first time, I don't know if I could do it a second time.

Sorry for the Eeyore-esque post, but dang if i don't need something good to happen to remind me that life is good and people aren't dead set on making everything more difficult for me.

Come on world, throw me a bone here!

Saturday Night Shenanigans

Step One: Go grocery shopping at an insane time of the night in your local warehouse grocery store.

Step Two: Find small toy that fits in the palm of your hand and fuzzy. White works, but brown is better.

Step Three: Hold fuzzy toy delicately in your cupped hands.

Step Four: Walk towards sister, hands outstretched. It is preferred if she is distracted by product labels.

Step Five: Say “Hey look! I found a mouse” and simultaneously toss fuzzy toy at sister as if creature where crawling out of your hands.

Step Six: Enjoy her reaction.

Step Seven: Try not to pee yourself from laughing.

Step Eight: Replay the events over and over until sister threatens to pummel you with box if Chex.

My night... a timeline.

3:30PM - Leave work to drive north.

5:15PM - Arrive at home, change, feed dogs, head east to pick up sister and children.

5:45PM - Head back south.

6:30PM - Arrive at Walmart to purchase birthday dinner ingredients.

6:32PM - Realize store is just a regular Walmart with no birthday dinner ingredients.

6:35PM - Emergency run back into store for potty stop.

6:39PM - Arrive at Jewel-Osco to purchase birthday dinner ingredients.

7:00PM - Arrive at birthday dinner destination.

8:30PM - Consume birthday dinner.

9:00PM - Clean up birthday dinner.

9:05PM - Consume ice cream and GF brownie.

9:15PM - Pack up kids and head back north.

10:35PM - Arrive home, let dogs out, pass out.

10:45PM - Wake up to Montana whining and howling. Yell. A lot.

11:00PM - Wake up to Montana whining and howling. Yell. A lot more.

11:35PM - Wake up to thunder that literally shakes your windows.

11:38PM - Conclude you are not going to die.

11:55PM - Fall back asleep.

12:05AM - Wake up to weather alert advising of tornado warning.

12:10AM - Reaffirm you are not going to die.

12:12AM - Wish JB was there.

12:14AM - Contemplate sneaking into roommates bed.

12:15AM - Chastise self for being a baby.

12:30AM - Turn on laptop to track weather pattern.

12:35AM - Cry a little a the sight all.the.purple. on the map.

12:39AM - Beg for sleep. Reaffirm you are not going to die.

1:30AM - Wake up to thunder and lightening putting on their show simultaneously.

1:35AM - Cringe at the sound of water running below you.

1:37AM - Take picture of waterfall in the basement.

1:38AM - Curse. A lot.

2:00AM - Pray for sleep. Consider the benefits of the house being decimated by tornado.

2:15AM - Decide no house = no Bernice. Dismiss idea.

2:27AM - Consider wacking self with frying pan to induce unconsciousness.

2:45AM - REALLY wish JB was there.

2:56AM - Fall asleep.

4:30AM - Launch alarm clock into orbit.

6:51AM - Waste 30 minutes of your day typing out a timeline of your night.





THIS is what I woke up to. Even though it just seems so... so... I don't know, wrong ---- when it rains, it pours.




I am at that point of exhaustion and frustration where I really don't even know what the answer is. It seems that right now, the best idea is to list the whole house for rent and then from there figure out just where the heck *I* would live.

In order to end this on a positive note, today I am thankful for rubber spatulas, rubber maid bins and coffee.

The Thing About Big Brothers

It isn't that I feel sorry for those that don't know what it's like to have a big brother. After all, there are at least a handful of times that I am sure I spent time wishing I didn't have one myself. But those times were few and far between because well, I have one hell of a kick ass big brother.

Growing up, Rick and I were inseparable. We did everything together. Kind of like Pinky and the Brain, but way way cooler and less rat-like. Sure he did his fair share of annoying big brother stuff like stealing my Blow-Pop and instead of just licking it, chewing it so he couldn't give it back and then repeatedly blowing bubbles in my face. He would tease me endlessly about my unending love for animals. All pretty harmless stuff and somehow he would always manage to find a way to make it up to me.




I really can't tell you how much I love Rick. Some of my happiest memories are of times spent laughing until my stomach hurt and I was running to the bathroom. Making up random songs while playing in the woods at our grandparents house. Spending hours upon hours talking until he was sound asleep on my bedroom floor. We even had a deal while I was in high school. I had to make his lunch for work every night and he would drive me to school so I didn't have to take the bus even though that meant he had to get out of bed 30 minutes earlier. If you know Rick, you know this is something that doesn't happen often. If ever. He doesn't just come out and say it, but it's the little things he does that lets you know he loves you and supports you.




It is a little frustrating for me to not be able to say it exactly how I want to. He is truly an amazing person and an even more amazing brother. He is there whenever I need him. He loves me even when I am being completely irrational. He takes care of me any way he can even if it means telling me things no one else will. He doesn't hug much, but when he does it is filled with intent and love and usually me gasping for air. None of that tap tap tap on the back crap.

Things haven't always been easy for him either but he works hard and doesn't rely on excuses. I am so proud of the man that he has become and I am so blessed to call him my brother.

I honestly believe that if more people had brothers like Rick, this world would be a much better place.

Happy birthday, Rick.

I love you.