Breaker Breaker 1-9

Everyone loves shortening things. Hell, we are not referred to as Emergency Medical Technicians, but EMTs. So it is only appropriate that we have a freakishly long list of nicknames for equipment and mnemonic devices to remember what we need to and of course for our own entertainment. Here is a small list of some that have popped into my head in the last 5 minutes…

MNEMONIC DEVICES
~ETOH: A drunken wanker is in your midst
~MBHGT: Generally known as My Baby Has Good Teeth, but of course they can be replaced with tits or testicles. Depending upon your gender.
~BDGART: Big Dead Guy Assuming Room Temperature
~PUHA: Pick Up and Haul Ass. The calls also known as scoop and run.
~FUBAR: F*cked Up Beyond All Recognition – pretty self explanatory
~OSDF: Oh Shit Drive Fast - For when everything is FUBAR and after you PUHA.

TERMS
~Whale Tarp: The sturdy tarp-like sheet with handles that is used to move patients with great weight with *ease.
~The Pucker Factor: When you sphincter slams shut so fast that if there was a lump of coal in your ass, it would be turned into a diamond in seconds. This determines the level of PUHA.
~Circling the drain: The best way to describe a patient that looks like hell. Generally has one leg in the grave and one on a banana peel.
~Cabulance: This term applies when the patient really doesn’t need to go to the hospital emergently, but they just don’t have a ride.
~Coocoo for Cocoa Puffs / Nuttier than a Snickers Bar: The best way to describe your psych patients.
~ Vegetable Isle - Where a patient will reside after massive head trauma.