Tomorrow I will be subjected to some very skeery things. Who knew continuing education could be so frightening.
Lymphatic Massage is what is in store for me. Not only does it suck that I have to spend 9 hours of my day with some complete strangers and not the Lieutenant, but most of them will be hippy-dippy-drink-some-herbal-tea-to-fix-what-ails-you kind of peeps. *Shudder*
Some of the rules for the day are as follows:
1. No shoes in the classroom. - But you must wear socks or slippers. I wonder if they would find my slippers with a giant Tigger head on the front offensive.
2. You can only use oil. - I hate oil. I loathe oil. It gets EVERYWHERE, stains EVERYTHING and you have no control over the tissue. And it stinks.
3. Business casual dress. - So I have to wear my good pants that will surely be ruined because some yuppy will try to hug me and get previously mentioned oil on me.
4. Who wants to attend a school that has this in their mission statement... "Our program is challenging, but you do not have to be brilliant to succeed." - Seriously? Bring on the booze! Lets kill off some brain cells to level the playing field a bit.
I know you are all thinking "Well Bernice, you are the one that signed up for it." Yes, this is true. It was cheap and worth lots of hours and I got suckered into it because Olga is going.
So, say a prayer, a chant, or medicate for me (woah - Freudian slip anyone? I meant meditate but whatever.)
I swear, if they start a hugging chain or a good morning chant, I am out like a fat kid in dodge ball.
Edit: I wonder what M.D.O.D. would think of me. You know, since technically massage therapy is a form of CAM.
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